NFL Rapid Predictions – One Quarter behind us now.

I’m saddened and I’m doing fairly mediocre in the prediction business. The sadness pours through my soul thanks to brutal realisation that my Colts behind couple of guys are not capable of reaching the top and that Andrew Luck’s career, once looking so bright starts to look very dim and scary…
The predictions business is easy to explain and deal with really. I know little about football and I shall stop doing this weekly column. There I said it.

Score for the WEEK FOUR 8-7

Total score to date 33-30

Closest game: Well, nothing was really in the realm of close but if I had to chose ten SEA@NYJ 26:11 would be it as I predicted the score to be 27:17 but that’s hardly anything worth writing in letter to one’s mum.

And now we can get a fresh portion of predictions for Week Five and this time let’s try to do better! (I was only joking earlier on, ha!).

Cardinals @ 49ers: Concussed Palmer takes on suddenly resurrected Kaepernick, while the sudden onset of rush colours creates some people unpleasant tremors.
TNF in its full glory!

49ers to win 23:16

Bears @ Colts: Angry Jerrell Freeman intercepts first pass by Andrew Luck that he returns for a touchdown.
On another Colts’ possession Freeman sacks Luck and forces a fumble returned for a touchdown…
Colts could have had easily sign him to a new contract last off season. They were a bit too greedy. The payout is now!

Colts to win 21:19

Eagles @ Lions: Now. The soon Rookie of the year completes more laterals than forward passes and the crowd is cheering as his completion rate is 85%. Matthew Stanford launches one big pass after another creating panic within the fans sitting in the end zones.

Eagles to win 23:21

Jets @ Steelers: Some notables from Harvard show up in Pittsburgh. They try to talk some sense into Ryan Fitzpatrick and ask him to change his day job. He refuses. Tosses another set of interceptions to local fan’s joy while Big Ben and Brown- Bell duo shred through green secondary.

Steelers to win 41:18

Redskins @ Ravens: There’s This bad taste in the water in Baltimore and Joe Flacco still has some flash backs making his face twitch. Josh Norman tries to read his mind but by accident he switches onto local radio station wave and gets distracted by weather reports.

Ravens to win 28:17

Patriots @ Browns: Well. The hell arrives to Cleveland in its full glory and it is dressed as Tom Brady in disguise wearing Godell’s costume. The local fans are confused but they believe in their team’s first win. It’s believeland in the end. It really is.

Patriots to win 48:7

Titans @ Dolphins: Oh. Here comes the Sun…. Aaaaaa… Here comes the Sun… Erm… Yes. There should be plenty of the Sun in the sunny parts of Miami. There’s also going to be a big man who got a lot of money but it is still yet to show what it was all for.
There’s also going to be some other people but only locally interested people will know their identities and will be able to recognise their faces.

Dolphins to win 20: 17

Texans @ Vikings: In alternative world where J. J. Watts doesn’t get hurt and he can keep on delivering hits, sacks, forced fumbles, playing tight end and sometimes even chipping in playing as a quarterback and scheming new blitzes as a defensive coordinator.
In that world he would keep his colleagues spirits high when they’d struggle facing very strong and sound defensive unit from Minnesota.
Well. In this world there’s still defensive unit from Minnesota…

Vikings to win 23:18

Falcons @ Broncos This is the Goliat vs Goliat thing. Matt Ryan flying on the flying carpet accompanied by Julio Jones, just flying are coming to city where the altitude makes everything that little bit easier.
No one knows who’ll be starting on Denver’s attacking side but all lights will be directed on the defending champs defensive maestros.

Broncos to win 24:21

Bengals @ Cowboys Hm… Welcome to Jerry Jones crazy world full of glitter. Where the stars seem to fall out of sky, straight on their bums into hospitals and rehabilitation rooms.
Luckily there is a man who can put Tom Brady into shadows with the longest streak of completed passes without throwing an interception. Yup. That is the thing, even if these passes don’t travel far.

Cowboys to win 27:24

Chargers @ Raiders The world is going to remember this match up as the old, fragile and injured vs the young, athletic and electric. There’s going to be a man that screams a lot and pulls funny faces when the cameraman is looking but that will be icing on top of that huge cake one must eat.

Raiders to win 34:26

Bills @ Rams He talked the talk and walked the talk and made one man wearing a hood angry. Now he goes onto the tour to the wild west, where his approach to life and lively persona fits in so much it could actually melt with the surrounding walls.
The home team is on a big high though and despite some struggles generating yards on the ground, the land around the stadium will shake and it’ll rumble!

Rams to win 18:14

Buccaneers @ Panthers And it appears to be a game of NFC South bottom feeders, despite many people thinking there was a chance at lossless season by Carolina. The many hits that Newton took this season seem to impact his thinking leading to even more hits.
It’s not like the other dude has it easy. No. Winston is said to be playing poorly just to annoy his coaches, so there’s that. Take it as you want.

Panthers to win 27:21

Giants @ Packers To end the week in some sort of harmony, there’ll be somewhat a classic game at somewhat classic venue led by some classic and classy Super Bowl champions. It is not expected to snow yet, so hopefully the fans will get some football on top of all the cheese.
As long as it not cheesing on Madden by hail marying using Rodgers, the head offices should be fine.

Packers to win 24:21

Ah. I needed to take this half serious half funny (someone please tell me it was funny!) approach to this because it is just going to be an awfully long season for fans like me, stuck with a great quarterback trying to get wins with below average team… Hopefully I’ll get at least 10 scores right, this week.


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